My Question of the Day for 08 March 2010 – UPDATED
My Question of the Day: When single parents decide to date, when is it appropriate for them to introduce their child(ren) to the person they’re dating?
My 2 Cents: I’d say there’s no hard and fast rule on when single parents who are dating should introduce their child(ren) to the person they’re dating. I would say that every precaution should be take not to expose the child(ren) to too many different people. This could send the wrong message.
At a time, when the parent thinks his/her child(ren) are ready to meet the person he/she is dating, then that’s when it should happen. With some children, that’s going to be immediately. With other children, that’s going to be later. The family dynamic will dictate when the moment is suitable.
Of course, it should go without saying that single parents should always be upfront about the fact that they have a child or children. That fact should never be hidden.
———-
Take a few moments to check out the tweets from Twitter on this subject:
———-
PROTECTED TWEETER I think that single parents need to be forthcoming to their date abt their kids, but intros 1st few dates–no!
NookSurfer that’s a good question, so many variables involved. I think main thing are the kids
ManofCivility This is tough. I’d have to think that one should wait until they’re sure that the relationship is serious at least. 6 months?
PROTECTED TWEETER immediately, they don’t have to me UR MAN, who wants to b w/some1 kids hate or they hate ur kids?
JoshDamage after 6 months lol
PendragonUK If the marriage is over it’s over and the divorce finalised in law. The next day?
———-
The commentary doesn’t have to end!
Please feel free to continue to add your comments below.
———-
RULES FOR COMMENTS
1. DO NOT include links in your post. There is a place for you to include one link when you’re filling out the Name/Email/Website information. Comments that include links will be deleted.
2. If your post is obviously irrelevant to the question at hand, it will be deleted. This is a tactic spammers use to simply show up on blogs.
3. Please keep your comments respectful. We can agree to disagree without attacking each other.
Hahahahahahaha. Woooooooo! Hahahahahaha! That was too freakin' funny! Thanks for sharing!
Was this answer helpful?
LikeDislikeWhen the relationship is serious and if you think the kid is ready. Otherwise, it might play out like this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r0EVSP_6XZA
Was this answer helpful?
LikeDislikeOthers have already said it, but you can't place a time frame on this at all. It depends on the kid and the relationship.
Was this answer helpful?
LikeDislikeEvery situation is different. It depends on the child, how well the people dating connect etc.
Was this answer helpful?
LikeDislikeI don't think you can place a time frame on this. Every child is different, and every child reacts in their own way to divorce and the possible new parent. You need to make sure your relationship with your new partner is serious, otherwise why should your child be involved.
Meeting the person you are dating, however, is no where near as damaging as the single moms I have known who move in with the other person. This is so confusing to the child and can create long term issues.
The most important thing should be the child. And being responsible about who influences that child's life. And to be very clear about this – having another man around your child is already an influence. They look up to him as an example of how men are supposed to act. They do not recognize a bad role model yet, just a role model. There are a lot of young men these days who do not know how to act like a real man, and many young women these days who have no idea what a lady is.
Was this answer helpful?
LikeDislikeI don't think you can place a time frame on this. Every child is different, and every child reacts in their own way to divorce and the possible new parent. You need to make sure your relationship with your new partner is serious, otherwise why should your child be involved.
Meeting the person you are dating, however, is no where near as damaging as the single moms I have known who move in with the other person. This is so confusing to the child and can create long term issues.
The most important thing should be the child. And being responsible about who influences that child's life. And to be very clear about this – having another man around your child is already an influence. They look up to him as an example of how men are supposed to act. They do not recognize a bad role model yet, just a role model. There are a lot of young men these days who do not know how to act like a real man, and many young women these days who have no idea what a lady is.
Was this answer helpful?
LikeDislikeMy child has not even met half of my dates, some dates are just that and I have no intention of intertwining the two of them.
If it's someone I'm actually dating, I play it by ear. I have to get to know him before I allow my child to meet him.
There's at minimum a three month time-frame of me seeing where the relationship is going before I rush my child into the mix.
AtlantaBizWomen
Was this answer helpful?
LikeDislikeMy child has not even met half of my dates, some dates are just that and I have no intention of intertwining the two of them.
If it's someone I'm actually dating, I play it by ear. I have to get to know him before I allow my child to meet him.
There's at minimum a three month time-frame of me seeing where the relationship is going before I rush my child into the mix.
AtlantaBizWomen
Was this answer helpful?
LikeDislikeNot until you know it's serious, and yes that's different to every person. Having read Steve Harvey's book; How To Act Like a Lady & Think Like a Man, I'm inclined to agree with the 90 day plan. A man or woman does not get the awesome privilege, benefit of meeting your children until he has passed the “probationary” period. You have to use wisdom and common sense in those situations.
Was this answer helpful?
LikeDislikeNot until you know it's serious, and yes that's different to every person. Having read Steve Harvey's book; How To Act Like a Lady & Think Like a Man, I'm inclined to agree with the 90 day plan. A man or woman does not get the awesome privilege, benefit of meeting your children until he has passed the “probationary” period. You have to use wisdom and common sense in those situations.
Was this answer helpful?
LikeDislikeThe single parent should know their child well enough to know when the time is right. There should be no concrete time frame since there may be many other factors to consider. For example, how old is the kid; what type of relationship, if any, does the child have with the other parent; there's just so much to be said. I'm not saying don't date, I am saying put first things first and your child should be number one.
Was this answer helpful?
LikeDislike