My Question of the Day for 08 February 2010 – UPDATED
My Question of the Day: You marry someone with children, but you have no children of your own. Prior to the marriage, your spouse agrees to have at least one more child so that you all can share a child together. Several months after you say, “I do,” your spouse decides that she/he doesn’t want to have another child after all. What do you do?
My 2 Cents: Being in this situation would be devastating for me, and I would feel totally betrayed and wounded. It may not lead to divorce, but I’d seriously be thinking about it.
It would take every bit of my faith to forgive my spouse for changing his mind, especially if the deciding factor for me accepting his proposal was that he agreed to father one more child with me.
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Take a few moments to check out the tweets from Twitter on this subject:
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Fem_Pru My answer is… Have a baby by someone else. (but talk about it with ur spouse first)
John_Hinds Real simple Fayrda. Don’t get married to someone who already has children 
LOL!!
Mo_Rease I’d be heartbroken.
acmeek I guess I need to know if an event changed his mind or is deception playing a role here. I still would feel cheated.
treschic67 I love Children & couldn’t imagine spending the rest of my life w/out 1 of my own. I wouldn’t be happy. We’d probably divorce.
JoshDamage DIVORCE HER IMMEDIATELY FOR BEING A LIAR. As well as selfish and inconsiderate.
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The commentary doesn’t have to end!
Please feel free to continue to add your comments below.
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I know I would want a divorce. I would be heartbroken and not sure if I would want to be married to someone that I cannot trust.
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LikeDislikeYou sue him or her for breach of contract lol Just kidding this like the harder question of the day lol I dont know what I would besides call my parents, or grandma they usually help me out with stuff like this. I honestly think now days you cant take ppl by face anymore. If its an agreement before marriage I would get into writting. Now if I was in the marriage and my husband changed his mind on me I would seek counseling first so that our emotions wouldnt doom us for divorce.
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LikeDislikeI believe marriage is a permanent situation unless there is infidelity so before I would get married I would try to see if this persons behavior really shows that he wants more children. But, even if after all that he chose not to I mean I'd just have to live with it. I think that is one of the challenges of becoming involved with someone who already has children when you don't.
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LikeDislikeThat's a tough one. I would try to keep the discussion open and try to persuade him over a period of time that I love his kids, but would love one of my own too.
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LikeDislikeI would defer to her.
She is the one who would have to carry the child, after all.
It's her body, her decision.
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LikeDislikeTough question, that could be a deal breaker. When two people join together one of the main focuses is to pro-create. I have a child and would love one more, I'd be very upset if that were to happen, I'd try to be understanding of his point of view and the reason he's changed his mind and then pray about it.
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LikeDislikei don't think the marriage could work…for one…my spouse blatantly LIED to my face. if he knew how important that was to me and then all of sudden changed his mind, that would make me question his integrity. (IT HAD BETTA BE something medical-not just..”OH i changed my mind” crap)
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LikeDislikeThat's a hard one. If we had agreed to have another child and she backed out after I put a ring on it, I would have serious doubts about continuing the marriage. I would feel betrayed. At very least, we would need immediate counseling because my trust in her would be shattered.
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