The Question: You haven’t seen your other parent (sometimes it’s the moms who leave) since you were very young or not at all. The parent who raised you calls to let you know the estranged parent contacted him/her out of the blue and is in a very bad way. S/he is in need of constant supervision, s/he has no friends to help him/her and no money to pay a nurses’ service or move into a facility that offers constant care. Would you allow your newly-found parent to move in with you and care for his/her needs??

My 2 Cents: First, let me begin my saying I thank God that I’ve been fortunate enough to have my mother and father in my life for my entire life. I know that having a two-parent household afforded me the opportunity to have experiences and privileges that may not have been possible with just one parent and three children. I do not take it lightly. If either of my parents needed constant care, I think my siblings and I would fight each other to take in one or both of them. They’ve been that good to us and for us. OK, having said that, let me answer the question.

I’d like to believe that as a follower of Christ I’d provide the care that a sick parent needed, even if s/he had abandoned me when I was small and I hadn’t seen him/her for most of my life. I know that’s what God would want me to do. However, I’d have to do a whole, whole, whole, whole–did I say whole–lot of praying to actually come to the decision to do it and follow through with doing it, and I’d probably initially say “Heck, no!” before I had a chance to think about it in terms of my spiritual obligation to “honor my mother and father.” That’d be my human nature overriding my spirit. When it’s all said and done, though, I’d like to believe I’d overcome my flesh and do the charitable and honorable thing, and I’d learn to reconcile with it at some point during and/or after it’s done.

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Take a few moments to check out the tweets from Twitter on this subject:

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PROTECTED TWEETER probably would because still a parent n I would need to hear both sides. Can’t go to heaven w/hatred in ur heart.

EpicView_SP Hard question but I think I would try to pay for someone to help take care of the estranged parent.

shargrove NO-this parent could not move in with me. However, I would find/contribute resources to facility to help with their care

PROTECTED TWEETER That would be a big no. [BLEEP] NO. I would consider sending some support (minimal) and I would contact a s

PROTECTED TWEETER It takes being a caregiver to understand what one will do. I would not do it. But that is me.

PROTECTED TWEETER nope. If I had the $, I’d hire someone to take care of her/him

MissMeandI – My parents slip up a long time ago, but I’ve had contact with both and STILL wouldn’t let my dad come live with me

coffeesassy Hard question but I say ‘yes’.

Grimsta2003 nope. I wouldn’t. If I had the resources to help I would but I wouldn’t personally watch him/her

rishaholmes I would take care of my parent…it is the right thing to do., no matter what.

SoftSpoken2 it would be difficult but I would. I consider myself a good person who does good things and usually follow the golden rule.

  xsashagirl Yes, I would put my pride aside and take care of my estranged parent because they are human in need.

Teaguem2005 …..aw [bleep] no!

md20737 I sure would not allow them to move with me. I wld give them suggestions on what they could do.

NightShade10 probably not, because being a parent has nothing to do with your “gene donation” and everything to do with your “time donation”

JoshDamage I dont think I would I am sorry. taking care of someone sick is a big job without the extra emotions and feelings. its too much

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The commentary doesn’t have to end!

Please feel free to continue to add your comments to the original post by clicking here.

My Question of the Day: You haven’t seen your other parent (sometimes it’s the moms who leave) since you were very young or not at all. The parent who raised you calls to let you know the estranged parent contacted him/her out of the blue and is in a very bad way. S/he is in need of constant supervision, s/he has no friends to help him/her and no money to pay a nurses’ service or move into a facility that offers constant care. Would you allow your newly-found parent to move in with you and care for his/her needs?

RULES FOR COMMENTS

1. DO NOT include links in your post. There is a place for you to include one link when you’re filling out the Name/Email/Website information. Comments that include links will be deleted.

2. If your post is obviously irrelevant to the question at hand, it will be deleted. This is a tactic spammers use to simply show up on blogs.

3. Please keep your comments respectful. We can agree to disagree without attacking each other.

The Question: Should no contact through social media sites be covered under a restraining order when one is in place?

My 2 Cents: This question was prompted by the following article: Charges against alleged Facebook ‘poker’ to be considered by grand jury.

Everyone who answered the Question of the Day, on both Twitter and my personal and public Facebook accounts, said that social media sites should be covered under a restraining order when one is in place.

I wholeheartedly agree.

As many of you have already said, “NO CONTACT MEANS NO CONTACT!” Cyberspace should not be an exception.

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Take a few moments to check out the tweets from Twitter on this subject:

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sistawithafro Hope you are well. Simply put, yes.

weblady1 Absolutely.

PROTECTED TWEETER Yes!!

rahsheen Seems to make sense that it *should* be covered. No different than a phone call or letter, right? Could get complicated, tho

DanielleRicks YES!

47project I think the rules should apply. I mean harassing is harassing, stalking is stalking. Easy to monitor too.

frparker Yes. The ability to harass still exist via social media sites. All forms of communication should cease: physical & electronic

TankaBar_JasonD you can’t call or text the person and harass them over the internet is covered legally with the restaining order.

sunshine625 Absolutely it’s still contact.

_Nitra_ ABSOLUTELY 100%!

jreneker I’m no law-talkin’ guy but I think they’d spell it out in the restraining order. Bad idea to tempt the judge, though.

NightShade10 You bet! Shouldn’t matter what medium you use, if there’s a no contact order that means just that. IMO

XPhile1908 yes.

queenesther YES! Eliminate any chance for mishap. Clearly, social networking sites are a great way to harass someone from a distance.

BLKMGK Yes, it should be included

Quintessence_T no contact whatsoever…none–including on the web..

mscynt It should be included..because when people are desperate they will try any means to get to you including social media

PROTECTED TWEETER ohhh thats a great question I never thought of anything like that.. but yes it should be barred no contacte means none at all 

tclarkusa Yes, no contact should apply to social media when restraining order is in place. No contact means NO contact.

rishaholmes YES. No cotact means NO contact!!!! Social Media counts!

MsJayye YES!!

TracyReneeJones they r

Pettra88 Yessss

PROTECTED TWEETER yes BUT thats kinda hard to control through the legal system. it would take a lot of time to track. it would be easy for…the defendent to be framed. i think the case wouldnt hold up much in court.

walkerdl Yes…You can do as much, if not more, damage thru social media. Online bullying occurs all the time

ishadowaddict I believe that no contact means NO contact. whether it be phone, social media site, etc.There is a reason y the order is placed

atane Absolutely! Harassment via social networking sites is serious. I’ve been cyberstalked before.

JoshDamage yes it should. no contact means no contact. the law should reflect advances in technology.

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Also check out comments from my personal Facebook account.

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And, there’s one more comment from my public Facebook account.

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N.A. Yes, I think so. That is another form of stalking and they definitely can still harass the person online.

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The commentary doesn’t have to end!

Please feel free to continue to add your comments to the original post by clicking here.

My Question of the Day: Should no contact through social media sites be covered under a restraining order when one is in place?

RULES FOR COMMENTS

1. DO NOT include links in your post. There is a place for you to include one link when you’re filling out the Name/Email/Website information. Comments that include links will be deleted.

2. If your post is obviously irrelevant to the question at hand, it will be deleted. This is a tactic spammers use to simply show up on blogs.

3. Please keep your comments respectful. We can agree to disagree without attacking each other.

The Question: You get invited to the baby shower of your close friend’s 14-year-old, unwed daughter. What do you do?

My 2 Cents: We all make mistakes. Some of our mistakes are small, and some are long-lasting and life-changing. It’s a part of the human condition, it’s true.

Children having children is nothing to celebrate with games, gifts, cookies, cake and ice cream. Aside from a young girl being overpowered and taken advantage of by a male who means her harm, a young girl getting pregnant at 14 years old is certainly avoidable. If young girls we know, regardless of whether they’re our blood relatives or young girls we come into contact with on a regular basis, are getting pregnant before their brains and bodies have matured and developed enough to handle pregnancy, childbirth and child-rearing, we’re failing these young girls as much as they’re failing themselves, if not more. If it takes a village to raise a child, then we can’t put this all on parents. It’s not about judging. It’s about accountability.

As a society, we have to shoulder some of the responsibility. We’ve allowed teenaged pregnancy to become the rule and not the exception. We say things like, ”Well, there’s no use saying anything now. What’s done is done.” That’s why some of these young girls end up pregnant again and again. What’s worse is some of the other young girls who come to these baby showers and see all the fun and games and gifts and good times, think they want the same thing. They’re too immature to see past the party. Some of them think, “If I get pregnant, someone will do this for me and my baby.” Maybe it’s not even the family having the baby showers for these young mothers-to-be. Organizations, even churches, are sponsoring baby showers for young girls who are pregnant.

Please don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying we should push these young girls into a corner and try not to look in that direction. Yes, they need support, love and encouragement, items for the baby and for themselves, since they’re not even old enough to legally hold a job. Supply them with what they need, but don’t make a celebration of it. People who have the heart to do so will help out without punch and finger sandwiches.

I will not attend a baby shower for a close friend’s 14-year-old, unwed daughter. Nor will I judge or lecture my close friend’s daughter or my close friend, for that matter. If they’ve chosen to have a baby shower, I will drop off a practical parcel of items for the baby days after the shower so that there’s no confusion that I’m not supporting or participating in a celebration but I am supporting and participating in this new life-to-be. If my friend’s daughter asks why I didn’t attend the baby shower, I’ll be open and honest with her about my perspective. I’ll also let her know she has my support to help her care for and raise her child, if needs be. I’ll also let my friend’s daughter know I’ll be happy to attend a ceremony of dedication/blessing/christening once the baby has arrived, since the baby had no say in how s/he came into existence.

If you need another reason young girls shouldn’t be having sex, read One in Four Teen Girls Have STDs.

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Take a few moments to check out the tweets from Twitter on this subject:

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KDavis pray for guidance. give a lovely gift. Encourage the teen mother to finish school.

PROTECTED TWEETER Throw together a diaper cake and show up. She gonna need all the support she can get

Speaklife2 U ask your friend what does he/she think U should bring as a gift, and U go and have fun.

Miss_Behavin_ Attend, of course, with a gift for baby and support for the daughter. She’s gonna need a village to lean on at that age!

Dknlvlydiva .. Support, takes a village

EpicView_SP I send a gift.

gregandmarlo I would go the shower and bring lots of gifts. a 14 yr old mom will need a LOT of support and love

DavidJSutton881 Lead that girl to Jesus real quickly because she going to need him badly to help her raise that child. amen

sunshine625 Id spank the mama (friend)! I’d go to the shower cause they’ll probably have cake

ibster I say “No, thanks, I don’t do baby showers it’s shameless consumerism”.

ATMMD I think I will have to think carefully about what kind of friend is that, allowing his/her 14 yr old to become pregnant.

PROTECTED TWEETER I would give a gift at a later date and not attend.

cpembleton Buy her some essentials and tell her to call me if she needs advice/tips

walkerdl If I could attend, I probably would

ishadowaddict I would support my friend but not the situation that her daughter is in.

PROTECTED TWEETER Take a GOOD gift. They’re about 2 tackle MAJOR issues. The least I can do is help her w/1 happy afternoon.

Piddlepro go ,she needs support.

dingane1 i just dont go…it doesnt do anyone any good to be angry about it.

MissMeandI I don’t go…I don’t go to adult baby showers, I’m not helping promote a barely teen’s pregnancy

PROTECTED TWEETER buy a gift and attend. teens having kids is more common than people dying of old age! sad indeed but who r we to judge.

jigsawverbiage 14-yo moms-to-be need stuff & support too. I’d offer both, not my personal views. Experience already will be her best teacher.

PROTECTED TWEETER thank God I am a guy and comfort in the fact that it is highly unlikely I would be invited. Lol.

CharTheArtist I would attend w/gift n hand & offer mom 2 be some much needed advice cuz my friend grandma 2 b obviously didn’t

IamRah I would send a gift but I wouldn’t attend. Attending would be like celebrating/rewarding something that shouldn’t be…

SGTMcClain you go and support the young woman, she will need all the support she can get, you can’t un-ring the bell.

DivoJ Put them on the Prayer List of a Local Church…….smh

BLKMGK Show up and bring a gift. Its too late for lectures now.

ObiOrion I’d likely say something snarky like, “Honey, you got an invitation in the mail today.”

ImABlackPoem I’d go to the baby shower only if I knew tht my friend fif nt encourage this pregnancy. I hv 2 sow n2 goof ground @ all times.

JoshDamage bring a gift and pray for the best. I certainly wouldn’t mention it at all.

FeminaPrudentia Although appalled by the situation, I would go and keep my comments to myself. It could happen to anyone.

NightShade10 I accept the invitation and get that girl the things she will need for the baby. Awkward, but she and her child need the help

md20737 You go and offer support to the child whose having a child bc you know it will be hard.

PROTECTED TWEETER you pray for the whole family baby mom and grandmom as you’re buying the gift for the shower

PROTECTED TWEETER go bc if her mom is your close friend, they are like family to u&even if u aren’t happy about it,the 14y/o still needs support

CHICAGORADIO You go to show the 14 year old support during what will be a tough time in her life, pray for her…In the card you offer her the opening ear and understanding heart of a sister/mother and give her your number…it is hard for me to turn a blind eye, what has happened has happened, your presence will not say I agree…She will have a tough time no doubt, the baby shower is the time 4 showing group support that will soon fade to a few if any

treschic67 I would NOT attend the Baby Shower. I Would pray for the Family & child but could not be supportive of the pregnancy

atane I’m not attending such foolishness. This should be a time of reflection, not celebration. It’s no party.

jluntzreport dont go. i am not supporting that nonsense.

rishaholmes wow! I guess u go…what’s done is done…sad proposition..

roaddoggz Find out what the daughter needs and bring a gift. i will not judge

Quintessence_T u go enjoy the festivities and don’t judge..

ChaChanna Go and bring a gift. What else can you do?

xsashagirl I stay my black [bleep] at home. LOL!

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The commentary doesn’t have to end!

Please feel free to continue to add your comments to the original post by clicking here.